By Catherine in France
May 30, 2023: I have some good news. The last few weeks my husband has been getting larger swelling in his penis, but rigidity was not quite OK. Here’s how extended lovemaking has combated ED for us. We are now just over 9.5 months since his cysto-prostatectomy on 12th August 2022. Collaborating on maintaining arousal has also enabled improvements beyond what drugs could achieve alone.
He took daily 5 mg tadalafil (generic Cialis) since the catheter was removed, but has unpleasant reflux. Therefore the urologist proposed sildenafil (generic Viagra) one month ago. With 100 mg it was better but not yet perfect.
The difference between involuntary nocturnal erections and those from conscious arousal
Last week we met the urologist and we were happy to announce that strong “morning wood” was again at home. He stopped us and said that the signals for night erection are not the same as those needed for sexual relations. He said that some patients have involuntary night erections and yet never experience erections again from arousal 😞. Night erections just mean that there is absolutely no vascular problem.
He killed our hopes.
The way we understand it medically, the problem to get hard comes from nerve-controlled influx of blood to the penis that is drastically diminished after prostatectomy (even with nerve-sparing surgery). As my husband is 72 years-old he would be expected to have only half the strength of influx of blood of a young man, even before his surgery. Then a second reduction as described by the urologist results in a not quite rigid erection. [Read more about penile blood flow]
However, coming back home we agreed that the strength of influx of blood to the penis for my husband was 100 % before the intervention. So we reclaimed our hope.
Extended lovemaking combats erectile dysfunction
In the evening we tried something new, just to see. We engaged in arousal for nearly 2 hours.
For the first 90 minutes his penis was bigger than recently and getting firmer. But finally as we continued with this extended lovemaking, his erection got back to exactly as big and hard as it was a year ago. And this erection lasted for at least 20 minutes.
This gave us confidence. Two hours of lovemaking with the final half hour back to full “normal” hardness!
And since then, a normal erection has been much easier to reach (about 30 minutes). I’m not sure if all men dealing with ED problems tried a sequence of two hours, but for us it worked to combat ED!
Does abstinence makes the erection get stronger?
After this we decided to have sex only 3 times a week (and no more everyday) to enhance his excitation. Wait and see….
Related posts
- Early days after prostatectomy – what the doctors didn’t discuss with us
- Experimenting, sharing responsibility and searching for support – 4 month report
- What it takes for a couple’s sexual relationship to survive prostate cancer – 6 month report
- The enabling role of soft penetration – 8 month report
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